A bold gang of hashers were standing one day
by the side of large reservoir
They gazed up at Clougha but no one did say
I hope that we don’t go that far
Away across fields were coming a pair
of hares with mud right up their knees
The Lune Valley Hashers aren’t as daft as they look
they knew that they’d soon look like these

Mud, mud, glorious mud
Nothing quite like it for cooling the blood
So follow us hashers, the runners and splashers
And there let us wallow in glorious mud

The hare took the circle and tried to convince
hashers that we’d nothing to fear
We didn’t believe a word, but then never do
We were already thinking of beer
Like thunder the hash horn re-echoed the sound
Of the song that they sang when they met
The Rambos and wimps, and some with new limps
They lifted their voices as one

Mud, mud, glorious mud
Nothing quite like it for cooling the blood
So follow us hashers, the runners and splashers
And there let us wallow in glorious mud

Now more thirsty hashers began to convene
By the side of a rather smelly farm
I wonder now what am I to say of the scene
That ensued by the Barkbusters car
They munched all at once biscuits kindly bought
Then followed the flour again
A regular army of Lune Valley Hashers
All singing this haunting refrain

Mud, mud, glorious mud
Nothing quite like it for cooling the blood
So follow us hashers, the runners and splashers
And there let us wallow in glorious mud

(With apologies to Flanders and Swann)