The Icy Spicy one

Well hash 890 remained resolutely hareless until about a week before the date . Thankfully, Lurch and Morticia leapt in at the last moment to fill the gap despite decidedly inclement weather in the week preceding.

Because they are “thinkers”, they chose to colour the flour in order that it stood out against the abundant snow of Ingleton and environs, and did this with all things -curry powder. This gave the effect of piles of brick dust or and was remarkably similar to the colour of the many dried leaves/ scattered remnants of rock salt in abundance in Ingleton and environs. DM even mistook a different organic matter entirely for the adulterated flour – more of which later.

First problem of the day was a full car park, resulting in a sort of Newtonian cradle of cars to-img and fro-ing in an attempt to park. Eventually we all assembled. But wait! A hare was missing in action! Sahib Lurch of the curried flour had left Memsahib Morticia to lay trail on a difficult icy lane at the end of the Rambo split. He announced cheerfully that she would report back on the degree of treacherousness on her return/if she returned. She did but with cautions that this route should be attempted only at our own risk. Ominous…

Off we r*n. Down into the village, away from the treacherous snow. Very soon we managed to lose DM in someone’s garden. Reunited after a time we progressed onward to a caravan park where at the next check DM claimed to have found trail (probably dog poo) and went off on his own little route. We dispatched the GM to recover him but to no avail. He eventually encountered the Wimps and was gently pointed in the right direction again.

Meanwhile, it was up into the snow and ice. It wasn’t long before LP made the first snowballs. I did warn him that if he threw them at HA there would be retribution. He didn’t listen. The first snowball fight ensued and retribution was served.

Delayed by this action and by a difficulty in finding the trail over a rushy field, the Rambos observed incoming Wimps. A plot was hatched involving several decoys – BS ahead on the trail, RA taking photos, LP and HA with a stash of snowballs behind a barn . It was a RAMBUSH!!! But the plucky Wimps didn’t take it lying down and several well aimed snowballs found their mark ( one particularly vicious one from FCS on LP)

On and up up to the BS where delights awaited. Hot chocolate, gluhwein,mince pies and chocolate digestives. Hares somewhat raising the standards here!

After the BS, the Rambos ascended into the hills with -as STT described them -spears! (walking poles). We had been advised they might be necessary on the Treacherous Lane. Very useful – especially for jabbing STT.

So we made it back through the drifts following the large footprints of Sahib, and alarming orange smears in the snow. We gingerly made our way down Treacherous Lane and only one hasher crashed, but unwitnessed so like the tree in the wood – did it happen? I’ll examine him for bruises tomorrow.

We all made it back unbroken and refreshed. Down downs were given for ostentatious slipping on the one patch of ice in an entire field -FCS, bimbling in a lost fashion -DM,and aggressive snowball fighting (all the Rambos).

Song of the hash - Shitty Trail to the tune of the Mickey Mouse Song  but hard to tell when the RA was singing!